Becoming a mother has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. It’s filled me with a sense of purpose, love, and pride I didn’t know was possible. But I’d be lying if I said that along the way, I didn’t lose a bit of myself. The sleepless nights, endless nappy changes, and constant demands of tiny humans can leave you feeling more like a caregiver than the woman you once were.
Somewhere between the chaos, I found myself looking in the mirror and not recognizing the person staring back at me.
It’s not that I wasn’t happy. I adored my children and cherished my role as a mother, but there was something missing—the version of me that felt beautiful, feminine, and yes, sexy.
One day, I decided to do something for myself. It wasn’t a grand gesture, just a small step. I bought a beautiful lace lingerie set, one that made my heart skip a beat the moment I saw it.
At first, I hesitated. “Isn’t this frivolous?” I thought. “When would I even wear it? Between diaper changes?” But I clicked ‘buy’ anyway, telling myself that this was more than just fabric—it was a step toward rediscovering the part of me that had been tucked away.
The day it arrived, I slipped into it while the kids were napping. Standing in front of the mirror, I felt something I hadn’t in a long time—attractive. Not just ‘put together’ or ‘dressed for the day,’ but genuinely, beautifully attractive. I wasn’t wearing it for anyone else at that moment. It wasn’t about my husband or an occasion. It was about me. And it felt so good, I- felt so good.
What I realised is that lingerie has this magical ability to reconnect you with yourself. It’s like putting on armor, but instead of steel, it’s soft lace or satin, whispering to you that you are still that vibrant, sensual woman beneath everything else. The confidence boost was immediate. I felt more present, more in tune with myself. And when my husband saw me later that evening, the spark that had been dimmed by the routines of parenthood flickered to life.
But more importantly, it wasn’t about his reaction—it was about how I felt. Wearing lingerie became a reminder that I’m not just a mother; I’m a woman who deserves to feel beautiful, sensual, and alive.
Motherhood changes us in so many ways, but it doesn’t have to erase the parts of ourselves that make us feel desirable. Sometimes, it’s the smallest acts, like slipping into a lace bra or a pair of silk knickers, that can remind you of the woman you still are.
To any other moms out there who may be feeling the same—don’t wait for the ‘right time’ or a special occasion to reconnect with your sexy side. Treat yourself to something beautiful, something that makes you feel incredible. You deserve it, not just as a mother or a partner, but as the wonderful, multifaceted woman you are.
I promise, it’s not frivolous, It’s an act of self-love.
